The premise of this column is simple. I think there are things in World Wrestling Entertainment that need to be altered a bit. I don’t claim to know everything. I don’t claim to be smarter than Vince McMahon. All I am is a fan of this business for over twenty years with the experience of writing about it for the last decade. These are just suggestions, ideas or critiques on my part because I’m hoping that WWE can recapture the magic that was there ten years ago when they went from nearly going under to succeeding at levels they had never reached before. Staying the course isn’t going to work. Change is needed. As a fan of this business I’m going to do my part to offer up some ideas. Complain isn’t healthy. Suggesting ideas is. I’ll always compare WWE to my favorite sports team. And if you know me, you know my favorite sports teams are awful (Rams, Raptors, Blue Jays and Maple Leafs) right now. All I want is for them to be better just like I want WWE to be better. It’s not that I hate WWE. I don’t think I ever could. It’s brought me too much joy over the years. It’s just that everything needs change, even World Wrestling Entertainment.
How about a few ground rules? None of the twenty things will involve bringing back a retired star like Steve Austin to in ring action because that’s not going to happen. None of them will be something like suggesting they steal Samoa Joe or AJ Styles from TNA because as far as I know both have contracts with them that they wouldn’t be able to get out of. What I’m looking at here are realistic things that WWE can do. Some of these things could be considered major happenings, but most of them are just tweaks to current things they already do.
Two things I want to point out: 1) Nothing about the PG rating. It’s not going away. It’d be silly for me to make a point that it should go. I don’t even know that it should. I know most will want that to be one 20 ideas. It’s not for me because to me it’s unrealistic to think it will happen. Linda’s running for office, Vince has grandkids, Hunter & Steph have kids – they don’t want to change it to TV14 again. Not anytime soon. 2) Nothing about the NXT angle. I like it, but it’s in its infant stages. Who knows? Maybe I’ll write a fantasy column on how I would book it. For this column I’m not going to touch it aside from one point.
These are not in any order. Why twenty things? Because I had more than ten and thirty’s too much, so I decided on twenty. Real creative, huh? Some will be long, some will be short. Enjoy.
Note: I wrote a “20 ideas for WWE” column about this in September 2008. Some of the intro is the same as that one. You can read it here if you’re interested.
Pay The Rock $5 Million to appear at WrestleMania 27
The buyrate for WrestleMania 26 fell to 885,000 after being at 960,000 for WrestleMania 25 and over 1 milllion buys in previous years. Part of it was due to the UFC having a PPV the night before, but it’s also due to the product. With that said, I thought the build for WM this year was good. The lineup was strong. There seemed to be interest. The results didn’t show it. That brings me to The Rock. Not counting Hall of Fame appearances, the last time The Rock appeared on a WrestleMania broadcast was in 2004 at WrestleMania 20. My idea is to pay him at least $5 million to work not only WrestleMania, but also to appear on 2 or 3 episodes of Raw before it. If he doesn’t want to wrestle, which is understandable, then make him the guest ref. All people will want to see is a People’s Elbow and a Rock Bottom anyway. His presence will help. That $5 million can be made up based on ticket sales and buyrates. WrestleMania is always a profitable venture for WWE as well as the city hosting the event. I would ask him about it in the fall. Maybe earlier. He does movies and he’s got a schedule to keep, but if you throw enough money at him and you do it early enough he might say yes. If $5 million’s not enough? Negotiate. Work it out. He’s worth it.
Move Smackdown to Thursdays
This won’t happen this year because they’re moving to Syfy in October and keeping it on Fridays. However, they could always do it next year. I still don’t understand why they would choose to put it on Fridays when they always had more viewers previously on Thursdays. Friday is the second worst TV night of the week statistically (Saturday is the worst), yet WWE wants their show to be on that night. I don’t get it. They want to “win” the night with their younger viewers, but they’re hurting the exposure of their company by sticking it on Fridays instead of Thursdays. Will it happen this year? No. Maybe next year. If they open their eyes.
Re-sign Bryan Danielson aka Daniel Bryan
You know the story by now. He got fired because he choked ring announcer Justin Roberts with his tie, which was deemed too violent by WWE. The idea is that once the 90 days are up, WWE will likely bring him back. He can work indy shows until then, but can’t appear on TNA. It’s believed that his return is inevitable. We’re looking at middle of September. My suggestion is you bring him back as a babyface who was ousted by the NXT group. When the group is in a big tag match, have him turn on the babyface side and join up with the NXT team because frankly they need good wrestlers. They don’t get much better than him. I think this is one of the 20 things that is a near lock to happen, but I still had to put it in the list.
No more guest hosts
I saw on Twitter today that wwe.com is celebrating one year of guest hosts. Celebrating? I’m mourning them. I’d say maybe 20% of them were enjoyable and added to the show. The rest either brought it down, took too much time or completely ruined the show. Do you think anybody watched Jerry Springer more because of his Raw performance? Do you think anybody decided to see MacGruber because of his Raw performance? Do you think anybody bought a ZZ Top ticket because of their Raw performance? The answer to all those are no. I could go on. I understand why they are there. Vince thinks he might get mainstream press by having a celebrity on. Then he thinks that he’ll gain more viewers because of the mainstream press. It’s been a year. Any reason to prove that theory true? No. You know when ratings went up on Raw? A couple of weeks ago after the NXT boys beat up Cena. That proves that a WRESTLING angle is what brings in viewers. Not only that, but a wrestling angle is going interest people in buying a PPV. A guest host doesn’t do that.
Tell Jerry Lawler to retire
Jerry’s been the main color announcer on Raw for about 17 years now. There was a point in 2001 when he quit along with his then wife Stacy Carter for a period of about 9 months, but he came back and has been in the chair ever since. He’s clearly off his game now. My suggestion to replace him is either JBL, if he was willing to come back, or William Regal, who might as well just retire since all they do is book him in stupid comedy angles these days. Give King a check, say thanks for your years of service and let him show up once in a while to get nostalgia pops. His time as a regular is over, though.
Make color commentators into heels
I’m not sure who made the decision to make all the announcers generic sounding, but I don’t like it. The only one that offers anything different is Matt Striker, who supports some heels but not all, and of course Michael Cole as it related to Daniel Bryan on NXT season one. The rest are all the same. Jerry Lawler has slipped to the point that he’s probably worse than Cole. Todd Grisham is as robotic as they come. Cole’s annoying as hell. I dislike it a lot. The best WWE announce teams were carried by the heel work of the likes of Heenan, Ventura or Lawler. And guess what? WWE was PG in those days. Even moreso than today especially during the Heenan/Ventura years. It has nothing to do with PG or TV14. It’s a decision made by WWE to not have their announcers show any personality. And I’m not a fan of it.
Bring back Mickie James
I’ll be perfectly honest with you here: The divas division in WWE is as bad as ever right now. On the Raw side, the best actual wrestlers are Gail Kim, who is barely used and Natalya, who is finally being put in the ring where she belongs. On Smackdown, Michelle McCool’s decent while Layla has improved, but I haven’t been that impressed by the Token Blondes (better name than Blondetourage) team of Kelly and Tiffany. And why do they refuse to let Serena wrestle? With Beth Phoenix injured and Melina injured (should be late July/early August when she’s back) there are leaks in this division big time. What do you do? Bring back Mickie James. I know WWE released her in April. I think it was because she is pursuing her country music career, which WWE would not profit off of although they did promote it on their website (WTF?). The whole “arriving late for the bus thing” in Europe might be true to an extent, but a reason to fire? No. It’s not because of performance because she was the best female worker in the company for five years. I don’t know if she is going to TNA or if she’ll just do indy shows on a couple of weekends per month. If WWE were to call her up in late July before her 90 days are up and say “don’t sign with TNA and we’ll give you a call in a few months to come back here” would she listen? I think so. And I think it’s in WWE’s best interests to bring her back. She can keep doing her music and wrestle at the same time. The woman is a workhorse; trust me I know.
Sign Awesome Kong
I wrote about this back in early May for my friends at diva-dirt.com and everything I said holds true. She’d fit perfectly and it would usher in a new era for a divas division that sorely needs it. Imagine a feud with a quality smaller worker like Mickie James or Gail Kim, who she already had a great feud with in TNA? Kong’s a heel monster that would add life to a division that needs it. The end result of these two signings is WWE bringing in two of the best female wrestlers in North America. It’s win-win to me.
Let women talk like women instead of like high school girls
Have you seen some of the dialogue that WWE’s “smart, sexy and powerful” women use? It’s awful. Yes, I realize the Laycool gimmick is over the top. That’s fine. What about the others? The babyface girls like Eve and Kelly show no personality while I almost miss Tiffany’s robotic “I’m memorizing my lines like a big girl” promos on ECW for the comedy of it all. I’ll never forget that Maria/Dolph/Melina angle from Smackdown last year. Some of the worst writing I’ve ever seen. Isn’t Stephanie McMahon the one that oversees the writing team? Shouldn’t she know that women can talk normally instead of like a bunch of 14 year olds that scream when a cute boy walks by? The WWE writing team: setting women’s rights back by 50 years. One week at a time!
Stop booking champions to lose non-title matches
This one really bothers me. According to the Wrestling Observer, former World Champion Jack Swagger had four singles wins on TV, six TV losses (Orton, Morrison, Undertaker, Kingston & Mysterio twice), a loss in a three way, a loss in the only tag match he had and three DQ losses. That’s 15 matches. He won four. Think about that. Four wins in 15 matches. And the guy is THE WORLD CHAMPION! Unbelievable. What’s amazing is WWE probably blames Swagger for “not getting over” or something silly like that. How can you get over if you are booked like an idiot? It reminded me of the reign they gave Rey Mysterio a few years ago when he was constantly losing on TV to bigger opponents as if it was Vince’s genius idea to show that he’s really not the best. You are trying to sell PPVs. Don’t have the champ lose non-title matches all the time. I would only do it in tags or maybe a triple threat if one of the other two got pinned. The champion represents the best. He’s the guy you want the fans to pay to see whether he’s a heel (pay to see him lose) or a face (pay to see him win). Whoever decides to make the champ look like a complete loser – and I’m assuming it’s Vince – needs to change that philosophy. It’s very counterproductive.
Give a push to the following two people…
There are a lot of people that I can say deserve a push. However, two stand out the most: The Miz and John Morrison.
The Miz – Nobody on the Raw brand deserves to win Money in the Bank more than him. It’s time to give him that main event shot. He can talk, he can wrestle and he can generate heat. He’s come a long way. Freshen up the top of the card a little. Give The Miz a chance.
John Morrison – I don’t understand why WWE is so reluctant to give Morrison a legit shot. He’s been stuck in midcard limbo for over four years now. He gets pops, he has good matches. What’s the problem? His promos. Yeah, they’re not great. So what? He can work. And when it comes to the upper card, that’s what matters.
Wish the following two people the best in their future endeavors…
Nobody likes to lose their job. Not me. Not you. Not a WWE performer…unless you’re like Carlito, who I assume didn’t give a shit by the end of his run. There are two guys that I’d like to see depart. I’m not even including the Great Khali here because I like Ranjin Singh’s sideburns so much. That’s loyalty.
Mark Henry – He hasn’t been there for 14 full years because of injuries, but he’s basically been around since 1996. I hear a lot of good things about Mark. Nice guy. People person. Everybody loves him. That’s nice. His matches are boring. His promos are poor. I’m tired of hearing how he’s a threat in the Royal Rumble every year. Sorry KOOL-AID~!, it’s over for you.
Vladimir Kozlov – I know why Vince employs him. They filmed some pilot to a sitcom with Kozlov as Santino’s best friend. Will it get picked up? Probably not, but they’re trying. See, to Vince McMahon having a Russian guy in his 40s use broken English or do dance numbers is quality entertainment. Two years ago I thought he might be a decent heel. Nope. Doesn’t have it. The tribe has spoken; it’s time for you to go.
More Raw’s in Major Cities
New York City, Chicago, Toronto – these are the three cities that deserve to have two or three live editions of Raw in a year. Right now they only get one a year. I know that WWE likes to book major house shows in these cities, sell out their buildings that hold about 20,000 and then put TVs in smaller cities because that’s a better way to sell out in the smaller cities. However, when a Raw comes from one of those major cities (and there are others, I know) it seems more important. I can still remember the Raw in MSG from late last year (remember Kofi’s Boom Drop on Orton?) while the Toronto Raw this year was one of the better ones largely because of the crowd. Chicago is the same way. Reward the cities that come out in droves, that make the most noise and that show the most passion. It’s a better viewer experience for those of us at home. I’d imagine it’s a lot of fun for the performers as well.
Bring back sitdown interviews
This was actually one I had in the 2008 column that I’m throwing in here too. When I mean sitdown interviews I mean the ones like we saw in the late 90s that helped develop characters of guys like Mick Foley, The Rock, Triple H and others. Even the silly Kane ones worked when he lit Jim Ross on fire. Surely these segments would be a more effective use of 3 minutes than some comedy match, lame guest host segment or diva match. If you want to develop characters, we need to hear from them. We need to know what they say or think outside of the ring. Humanize them. Let these guys talk outside of the usual setting like a promo inside the ring or in a backstage segment. It would help. Don’t you think it would be a good use of time for a younger wrestler like a Dolph Ziggler or Zach Ryder to try to get their personality over? I think so. Bring them back. It’s a better use of time because it actually helps the performers you want your fans to see. Seems like an easy one to me.
Add more people to the Straight Edge Society
When I say more, I mean at least one more veteran that’s on the roster. The rumor is that WWE wants to turn either Kofi Kingston or MVP. I say let it be MVP. They can have CM Punk cut a promo on him saying his lifestyle of partying in Miami Beach has done nothing for his career. Mention that he won the US title before. Now? He’s barely on TV. Have him talk about how he’s lost his focus, lost his edge and lost his will to win. In the short term, have MVP fight back. Then, after weeks/months of fighting it, he can turn. If he’s in a tag match with a popular babyface like Rey Mysterio or Kofi Kingston it would work perfect. The SES garners tremendous heat. It would do wonders for MVP’s career. I’ve always liked him (two years ago I wrote he should be pushed to the main event), but even I can admit he’s regressed a bit the last few years. You can have CM Punk in the main event picture, MVP a level right below that and Gallows/Joey Mercury in the tag title hunt while Serena could also be in the Women’s title picture. The gimmick works. The stable works. Use it to benefit a wrestler that deserves a push. Use it on MVP.
Get Edge & Christian on the same show
Remember the draft? Edge got moved to Raw early. I was so excited. Christian was on Raw, so I thought finally they’d be on the same show again. Nope. Christian got moved to Smackdown. That same week Christian and Edge had a great promo together while the next week on Raw they had a match that hit the three star level easily. So why are they not on the same show? I don’t get it. To me, it’s an asset to have two guys that have worked together since grade six in your company. That familiarity is a good thing. Their ability to work together as allies or work a match as foes should be something you can capitalize on. Instead, they stick them on separate shows. Long time fans would like to see them together and newer fans would probably like a feud with them because it hasn’t happened since 2001. Of course the problem is Edge is a main eventer while Christian is trapped in the midcard. Don’t you think Edge would like to be the one to elevate his good friend? I think so. Probably won’t happen, but I’d love it.
Build an actual WWE Hall of Fame
I have always said and will always say that WWE’s Hall of Fame may get a lot of name recognition, but it’s not legitimate. Part of what they need to do is get deserving people like Bruno Sammartino (hates Vince) and Randy Savage (Vince apparently hates him) in there while kicking out undeserving ones like Koko B. Ware or any number of the celebrities that are in. What could help them come close to legitimizing it is by building an actual, physical Hall of Fame that fans can visit. Major pro sports leagues like the NFL (Canton, OH), NBA (Springifield, MA), MLB (Cooperstown, NY) and NHL (Toronto, ON) have them. Why not WWE? I know WWE didn’t care about the Hall of Fame all through the 90s and until WM20 in 2004, but if you’re going to do it every year you might as well stat building a HOF. Plus, it would be a cool place for fans to visit in the New York or Connecticut area. I hope it happens sooner rather than later.
Get rid of the Spinner Belt
Normally I don’t care about things like this. I know a lot of people do. Frankly, that belt has overstayed its welcome for many years now. It was okay when Cena had it. At least when Cena had an edge to him. When others get the belt it just looks weird. Plus, Cena himself recently said it’s stale. Of course, Vince probably thinks it’s still cool and nobody in the company will likely tell him otherwise. It needs to go. Now.
When HHH returns, make him a heel
I know nobody in WWE is allowed to say it, but when compared to heel Triple the face version of the guy is not very good. I know he’s accomplished a lot. I know a lot of fans like him. That’s fine. The problem is it’s hard to be sympathetic to the guy that’s been in main events for over a decade, is married to the boss’ daughter and has more world title reigns than anybody else in the company. I don’t want him to save the WWE from NXT. I’d love for him to lead NXT. That would be cool. I’d love for him to be an asshole again. That’s the Triple H I know. That’s the Triple H I like.
Book John Cena vs. The Undertaker at WrestleMania 27
I have no idea if this is in the cards, but it should be. It’s been many years since they feuded, so it would be the perfect time to do it at WrestleMania. I think only the most hardcore fans would know when the last match was and since WWE refuses to acknowledge history we know they’ll say some bullshit about it being their first meeting or something like that. It’s a money match because Cena’s been the top guy in WWE for the past five years while Undertaker obviously has his undefeated streak. Does a title have to be involved? No. It’s a test for the top guy against the legend. It sells itself pretty well.
———
What do you think? How’d I do? What idea would you suggest to WWE in order to help them improve their product? Email me at [email protected] with feedback to my ideas or with ideas of your own. I will run a selection of them up at my site at thejohnreport.net over the next week or so. I look forward to seeing what you think.
As always you can check me out on Twitter at Twitter.com/johnreport as well. I tend to have fun on there. Lots of random stuff on my mind.
Thanks for reading.
John Canton – [email protected]
Visit the blog: thejohnreport.net
Add me on Facebook at Facebook.com/thejohnreportnet
and Twitter at Twitter.com/johnreport
Visit My Archives to view ten years of The John Report columns.